Recents in Beach

Gambling is a slightly better hobby than sex claims Bet365

Women prefer gambling to disappointing sex picture

The embattled gambling industry fought back yesterday as Bet365 announced that gambling was 5/4 favourite to be a slightly better hobby than sex, and far less likely to lead to destitution.

Denise Coates, CEO, told the Badger from her 24 carat gold plated island in the Bahamas, “Sex and gambling can both lead to disappointing outcomes. But at least with gambling you have a small chance of winning.

Ongoing poor sexual performance can lead to people losing their self-worth, their pensions and even their homes.”

Professional gambler Billy ‘No Shirt’ Casino, who lives in a dustbin under Richmond Bridge told us, “I think she might be right. I’m a pretty good gambler but my missus kicked me out because I couldn’t do the erotic accordion.”

Coates, who trousers an annual salary of  £275 million, is serviced by a harem of 45 men who work on a strict rota-basis.

Now that’s what you call an accumulator.