Recents in Beach

Table Manners

hr nail gun picture

A man from Essex was celebrating yesterday after a court ruled, in a landmark case, that he should have the right to nail his testicles to his desk at work.

A weary Judge Everest Balls concluded, ”I can see no reason why not. This is a perfect example of what modern diversity and human rights law will require.”

An elated Gary Bleeder gingerly told the Badger, “I’m so happy. It’s a terrific relief. I was genuinely concerned I might be given the sack!”

So what’s next?

“First things first, I’ll hobble off to Tesco’s and do the weekly shop, then I’ll get the 31A bus home, put the dinner on and tell the family the good news. The kids will be so excited.

I’ll serve up supper, put on some Dire Straits, say Grace, nail my testicles to the table, and then we’ll enjoy a lovely evening meal together.”

Crikey. So how do you think work will react?

“Most people have been lovely about it. They want me to be their Diversity Champion! I’m so looking forward to the first day back. Facilities have even provided me with a desk that has wheels, so I can get to meetings OK.”